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No More Tequila For Santa

by Michael Gaither

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about

Santa hasn't come around since I was a kid, so instead of leaving out milk and cookies, I "put out something stronger". And it all went downhill from there - in a very funny way.

Songwriters Michael Gaither and John Cirillo say, "we wanted to write our own epic, 'Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer'-style funny Christmas story in this tune. " It's an upbeat Americana song, with a full band, female harmony, and some tasty 12-string guitar accenting the chorus.

And as Michael has discovered in playing this song live, it's an instant crowd singalong and just sketchy enough to play out all year long.

lyrics

I used to leave out milk and cookies
For Santa on Christmas Eve
It’s been years since he’s stopped by here
But I still believe

So I put out something stronger
In hopes that he’d drop by
A bottle of Jose Cuervo
Now the big guy just ain't right

No more tequila for Santa
He really tied one on
No more tequila for Santa
I found him passed out on our lawn
He crashed his sleigh into my Chevrolet
And that’s just all kinds of wrong
No more tequila for Santa
‘Till Christmas day is gone

Now It’s quarter past midnight
And those toys won’t deliver themselves
I’ll put the coffee on, double strong
For my inebriated elf

And you know it’s gonna be all my fault
If Christmas gets ruined this year
Now Santa’s sharing his tequila
With all eight reindeer

No more tequila for Santa
He really tied one on
No more tequila for Santa
I found him passed out on our lawn
He crashed his sleigh into my Chevrolet
And that’s just all kinds of wrong
No more tequila for Santa
‘Till Christmas day is gone

Apologies to all the kids
For the misdelivered gifts
But you should see the viral photographs
“Hashtag drunk Santa gifs”

He’ll blow an “oh point five” in those friendly skies
I hope Rudolph knows his way home

No more tequila for Santa
No more tequila for Santa
No more tequila for Santa
‘Till Christmas day is gone

credits

released November 19, 2019
Words and lyrics by Michael Herman Gaither and John Cirillo

Guitar and vocals - Michael Gaither
Electric guitars - Joe Bac
Bass - Mark Hall
Drums - Jeff Baker
Harmony vocal - Eliza James
Producer/Engineer - Henry Chadwick, The Compound Studios, Ben Lomond CA

Copyright 2009 ASCAP / MaryLou Tunes and St Cruz Mountain Publishing

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all rights reserved

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about

Michael Gaither image

Michael Gaither Santa Cruz, California

Michael Gaither turned to songwriting after a background in journalism and a narrow brush with standup comedy. He's
released five CDs of original material, all of which have received international airplay.

Offstage, Michael is a DJ on the legendary Americana station, KPIG radio. He also produces/hosts the “Songs and Stories” podcast. ... more

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